Off Season, AKA, Young, Dumb and You can’t fix stupid, season.

Every Winter, and Sping, we get on our knees and pray to whatever higher power we believe exists and ask, please don’t let my player show up on TMZ.

Because the NFL is a franchise full of young and lusty, testosterone driven males (except for Brady* and his uggs), our wishes never seem to be granted. Hormones cut off the logic part of the brain and, hold my beer, or, anger management crap, takes over. Schools out for summer and all hell breaks loose.

I was a Catholic School girl. You put the lid on too tight and eventually all that enforced suppression bursts out like a Kardasian out of her clothes. That’s what’s going on with these players. During the season they’re living in a monastery, but when Winter is Here, the Game of Thrones takes over.

Like GOT, the NFL stands for: Not Fair League. Queens and Kings can do what they like and unless they’re slipped some poison or fed to the dogs, they go unpunished. Life isn’t fair and football for dang sure ain’t fair. In the case of football, talent and money rules all.

Kill somebody, blow your fingers off, torture and kill some dogs, abuse your kids, drug a girl, drive drunk, etc. and management will pretend they care, until it hits them in the wallet. Fans will feign disdain, while they wear that player/team jersey. Win for us, and all is forgiven. Stay out of trouble for a bit and you’re redeemed.

If you’re a bubble player, then false morality steps in and actions are condemned. Unless you’re a high draft status, then you’re given a reprieve for a while, as long as you eventually produce. There is only one rule in the NFL: produce, we slap your wrist, don’t, you’re given the Theon Greyjoy treatment (tortured and removed of a needed  male piece).

Which brings us back to young and dumb. The ones who screw up on our team are merely just sowing their wild oats, a guy does the same thing on other teams, and he’s up for Meme of the Year Award. Us fans put the H in hypocrisy and we own it, even have the jerseys that show it.

Jerry Jones must have his team attorney at the top of his most recent calls list. While Bob McNair doesn’t even know the name of theirs. Some teams keep theirs on speed dial 24/7. To them, this is busy season when they make their bucks; like tax attorneys. It’s all about gaming the system while trying to maximize the buck.

For rabid fans, hearing the NFL alert has us peeking with one eye, afraid to look. Dear Lord, baby Jesus, please let it be Elway signing his contract…oh, it’s a mess up, please don’t say Denver, don’t say Denver, don’t say Denver. Anyone seen an Aqib tweet lately? Whew. It’s Dallas. Oh, wait, here’s another one. Is it Elway? Nope. Rats, it’s us. Oh wait, it’s not a biggie. Whew.

And so our Winter and Spring goes, wondering which guy is dinging on our phones, while we cross off another day until Training Camp, when the alerts are just news.

A question still remains, do these high profile names screw up because they are young and dumb or do they not think because they’ve spent their lives being treated to a different standard? It doesn’t matter if you’re only on the Cleveland Browns practice squad, if you made it to the NFL, chances are you were BMOC (big man on campus) somewhere.

It means any trouble you may have gotten into was swept under the rug. It means people buy you drinks. Challenge your manhood in bars. Sleep with you after a hello in an elevator. The more name recognition, the more talented, the more things you’re given that you didn’t earn. Entitlement is a poison that eats the soul and fuels stupid.

For some, a mug shot wakes them up, for others, not so much, especially if the fans and the bottom line of teams don’t care. For some, this is the season to learn and grow, for others, it’s a joke.

As fans whose hard earned dollars drive this sport, we need to accept that the actions of these young, dumb and slightly stoopid are all products of an environment we support and pay for. We get what we’ll accept. What we accept and explain away is bad behavior because it suits us.

If we really wanted to watch a sport that is “fair”, with men who rarely do young and dumb, we’d walk away from football and make golf the number one sport. The PGA, nor its fans, except anything less than fair. The entire sport relies on it.

Ding! Please don’t be Denver (but I’ll cheer for my team anyway).

%d bloggers like this: